Holiday Blues?!?

I really haven't been in a good mood the last few days with Eric making a very short appearance at Christmas and Samantha leaving, I thought I was having the Holiday Blues.

Well, some of you might have heard about Postpartum Blues, well the HB is the same but without the labor pains and pushing out a head the size of a cantalope from somewhere something that big should never come out of. Ahh, the sweet sound of women screaming from giving birth. Memories.

I was back in bed trying to catch up on some extra R&R when the Future Mr called. The conversation went something like this: (I think)

Future Mr.: "You sleeping"
Future Mrs.: "I was."
Future Mr.: "I updated my blog."
Future Mrs.: " Oh really? What is it about?"
F-Mr.: "Well, if I told you that would ruin the surprise."
F-Mrs: "So that means I need to get up and go read it. Is it going to make me cry?"
F-Mr: "I hope so."
F-Mrs.: "Great."

So being the good fiancee that I am, I dragged my butt out of bed, turned on the computer, went to the Future Mr.'s blog: Roadside Manners. The first thing I saw as a picture of me. I said "OMG, what an ugly picture." "Oh, no" says F-Mr. "That is a good picture." "It's the 'your going to be home when?' look." Once I got past the picture, I started to read.

I really don't know when this happened but I am know an emotional basketcase everytime I read something heartfelt or see a romance movie, I cry. I don't seem to recall when that happened. I just turned in a big, huge bowl of mush. I used to be the strong one. Not letting a mushy story or movie get to me. I wonder if there is a support group out there for people like me. If not, I will have to start one. It would be called STRONG GONE WRONG. Ok, not a good name but its a start.

As I started to read, I started to cry. Not the big boo hoo's but the watery eye one that makes it hard to read. Now that the eyes were watering, the nose starts to run. Great. Grabbed a tissue, blew my nose and continued to read.

When Eric said that he wanted to drive truck for a living, I was behind him 100%. After the training that he had, he had to sign a contract for a year to work for the company that had trained him. Ok, it's only a year. I can do this. We decided that if he was going to make any money doing this he would have to be gone 3 weeks at a time and then be home for 5 days.

I know at times that I have not been the happiest of people and I know that puts extra stress on Eric when he is suppose to be home and is not. So that is why he said what he said in his blog. Don't get me wrong he says that stuff to me all the time. The holiday's have been difficult with him not here. We both understood that this was going to be difficult but I didn't realize how hard it was going to be.

So, that is why I thought I had the holiday blues. Yes, thats right "thought." I had a hard time with my contacts yesterday, couldn't see. I kept having to clean them. I didn't know what the problem was until I woke up this morning. I have a head cold. My sinus are full even though my nose is running which makes my eyes watery and hence the contact cleaning frenzy of Jan '08. So, as I write this my head is spinning telling me I need to lay down. Off I go to my nice soft and fluffly down comforter to snuggle my head cold away. I might even take some cold medicine.

If I can find some.